Wednesday, August 8, 2007

Loneliness

I took a peek into the future today. Not a pretty sight I can tell you. My husband is away for a few weeks, child number one is in Portugal, number two is either at her own place or at her boyfriends and number three is (if not asleep) away at work most of the time. As Wednesday is my day of I had the house to myself and no one to talk to but the dog. He is starting to avoid me.. It’s a good thing all my limbs are still in good working order. At least the dog had a field day. Three lengthy walks where normally one is the norm (plus a few short ones, before you take pity on the mutt). I didn’t get a call all day. I tried phoning my friend, but she wasn’t at home and it wasn’t until late afternoon that someone came to the door and that was not even for me either, but the contractor for the house next door, picking up a key. I’m not counting MSN conversations nor the one-sided one-liners on Twitter or Numpa.


For the first time I could understand my mom a little better, how she couldn’t be bothered to get dressed anymore those last few years. Why she just sat in that comforting chair zapping from station to station, getting lured into participating in those stupid games that never brought her anything but huge bills. Why she would call me at the silliest of times just to say she needed to hear my voice.
So…if you have a family member out there that you know is all alone, pick up the phone. Not tomorrow but right now and ask them how they have been. Give them a few minutes of your time and make their day. I was on their wavelength more or less for just one day and I can tell you loneliness is an ugly feeling



5 comments:

Bonez said...

Wow! I must be very strange because I love being alone when I get the opportunity. I crave chances to have everyone in the clan off doing their own thing so I can just sit and read undisturbed or watch that movie that only I would like or to take a nap without someone poking fun at me. Serenity and solitude are two of the things I have so little of in my life. Peace and quiet to think my own thoughts without worrying about being responsible to someone else or for someone else. Just me and myself together alone. sigh...
If I had known you needed company I would have given you a jingle. I love your verbal portrayal of your loneliness, Marloes. Mental images that brought me along with you as you wore the dog out on those numerous long walks. Thank you... I needed the exercise ;)

Marloes said...

Hi Tony, being alone for a few hours or an afternoon doens't really bother me either, but a whole day is just a wee bit too much. I need to have people around me, even if they are somewhere else in the house doing their own thing, as long as I know they are there Im ok. I don't sleep well (just plain scared on my own)and just as in the song I leave the light on when I go to bed.
I can take you on a few walks in the future if you need them Tony, just holler.

Rev. Sharon said...

Boy did this resonate with me... I recently broke ranks after 28+ years of marriage, and while there are some times when the solitude is a real blessing, the loneliness is stifling.

The beauty of your use of language is quite wonderful; may I put a link to your blog in the list on my own?

Blessings,
Sharon+

Jenn in Holland said...

Oh so true, Marloes. While I love having time alone at times, I don't love being alone for very long. I love people too much and it will be an odd day to find myself like your Mom found herself, alone all the time. I hope it's a long way off!
Next time, call me!

Marloes said...

@rev Sharon, thank you for your kind words. I will gladlyreturn the favour and add you to my list as well. As far as wonbderful writing is concered I have seen yours and I am impressed!

@Jenn, will do, I promise..:)